ETERNAL LONGING

All I have seen, all I have known, all I have been, caught in the tide of time. I am a pathetic, worthless leader, the poorest example of a Consanguinean of The Nostromo.

This internal battle, my burden, my choice. I see, my love. I see what I already knew. I am the most powerful player in the game of my life, or so I should be.

But I am weak! The battles I must fight exist only in my heart, my mind and try as I might I cannot run from myself. So I stop running and turn to face the truth. I am a blood thirsty monster created by one of the most hideous and vile creatures of the night! I am a Vampire!

So my most cherished Kyrania, I tear you from my chest and filled with agonizing grief I slip into darkness, cowardly hiding my face in disgust, to do what a Vampire must! Tonight I shall find ecstasy in the consumption of Human blood!

The flowing blood takes my soul away and in the sanguine rush I live again! My renewed self united once more with the family of unending darkness!

I still dream though. And in that dream my only wish...Our paths shall cross and we will meet as we did once upon a past. But this time, in my dream, I take you with me, in me, in you and enraptured we will be able to walk together on the other side... Together!

Ah, and all life reflected in the blood, full of light rushing through me, through you until blood, the life, surrounds us forever.

Come with me and I'll take you under the heavenly stars in the black sea of night. We shall build our home, a castle made of Chalcedony and Bloodstone and hanging gardens filled with the most precious flowers, shimmering in the moonlight, shall provide divine illumination wherever we walk.

I have no hopes but yet I dream. I will dream tonight for the Human blood shall provide warmth, sanctuary and peace on this cold night...And perhaps I shall dream of you, of me, my sanguine love.

I feel tortured here...without you...

...in this house of the Nostromo, our home. Perhaps it is my endless longing for you, Kyrania.....yes, you who keeps my heart hostage on these long, sweet Summer nights.
My thoughts have been torn between bitter love, aching wantoness and the dreadful hate that grows deep within this cold, dark, isolated Castle Nostromo! I am alone!

Deception and conspiracy fill this hellish place on the edge of the Unholy Nostromo forest! This league of deviants lead by Armand grows with every moment. I confess I have been questioning my ability as a great and noble leader, though I would never show that face to anyone within these castle walls. Tristan, Armand's Lure has captured my attention. He has been Luring for my desirous thoughts...

Oh young Lure, I know your aim is for my affections and I must ask myself...why?

Why does Armand send you to me? Does he think you can pull me into submission? Gain control over my mind?! Find weakness?! I am Emperor and cannot be swayed that easily Sweet Angel! Certainly not by a Lure! I will not betray my heart, but you cannot know that and so, you shall return, again and again...relentless in the chase, a pursuit without reward!

Soon Armand will become weary of these futile games and take your life!

Maybe it is I who could benefit from your chaste thought...

Are you truly loyal...loyal to one...
...to Armand?

Would you let him hurt me...Tristan?


I didn't think so.

The interim council has been put in place. They shall serve as the ministry until the eve of my coronation. My father hand picked these honorable Nostromo to serve as the unitary authority should a sudden leave of duty befall him. Perhaps this was a foreshadowing of the heinous atrocity that took his immortal life. The Sarim shall pay for taking our leader, my divine father from us!

Armand has voiced his upset about the new ministry, this does not surprise me in the least. He has been vying for a seat on the Consanguinean Council for years uncounted. As I mentioned previously, honorable Nostromo!

His entourage increases in number and I'll tell you now, it is an offence! To create a Lure without accordance of the rights and privileges granted by The Consanguinean Council, is punishable by death! Armand's Lures are young, very young, a blatant display of his disloyalty to the new regime. Playing lustful games with the chaste blood of youth shall also lead him to everlasting sleep!

I will have Bastian send Christos out into the coterie of sexual innocence. Christos has a way of subduing the Lures for they harbor the same voracious appetite for carnal pleasures. Tristan, Armand's intimate Lure, willingly gave in to Christos but not much information was unveiled. Though he enjoys toying with the inexperienced thoughts of the blossoming vampire, Christos dominates the sport of pursuing the chastity of a new Lure. If we are to reveal Armand's true intention of overthrowing the current ministry, Christos will have to focus on the mind and not the flesh of his prey. Bastian must quicken his training in strengthening Christos's mentality. Only through the voice of youth shall we find that which we seek!

On this cool eve many things disrupt my sanctioned state of being. The Sairim ready themselves to celebrate their season of growth, the Spring Equinox. My heart swells with an amorous and most passionate warmth as my blurred thoughts compel me to Kyrania.

She loved this season in particular for it is a time of birth and growth. Perhaps the spell of the Sairim invoke these memories of the past we once shared. I know my love for her shall never die, I am hers eternal. I must stay in my chambers during these nights. Like the wolf who preys upon the sick and the weak, the Nostromo too, can detect vulnerability.

Christos has returned with more knowledge regarding the secret meetings of the opposition within our order. Armand does indeed lead these gatherings of betrayal. His Lure, Tristan is very young and is easily swayed in thought. His soul is like fire and his immature nature, short temper and quick lip made it easy for Christos to gather answers to all questions. Christos is not much older than Tristan yet as I mentioned once before he is quick witted and most calculating. Seducing Tristan is only fore-play to a sagacious Lure such as Christos. Gifted with such brilliance, intellect and a highly developed sense of intuition, Christos can have all who harbor an appetite for lust, willingly obey his every command.

Armand should have chosen his Lure with sound mind, instead he lets his loin govern thought. Let us hope his followers are just as deficient in intellect and I shall win this battle using only my pretty Lures. I find amusement in the idea.

The evening breeze carries with it the scent of fresh spring flowers and the gentle sound of the willows calls me to the edge of my balcony. Perhaps I shall drift in the fragrant eventide, down to the outskirts of the Sairim village and celebrate secretly this season she loved so. Come with me Kyrania for at this very moment I am with you, in my heart.

Christos has been a great emissary for the true Nostromo. He has brought invaluable information to Bastian, my second, regarding the conspiratorial meetings in the Black Forest. I am sure this league of treachery grows in numbers. It has been confirmed that Armand holds a high rank within this new order. Christos is but a Lure, a newly made Vampire yet he possesses the bold essence of a Consanguinean, a true Brother of Blood. He is Bastian's Swain and both shall be given honor.

The task that lies before me shall be all consuming. Unmasking those who seek my eternal rest will be difficult indeed. Mastery of thought, both prominent and conspicuous is a Nostromo gift which is all too common. It will take time and a most cunning strategy to win this match. A young and artful Lure such as Christos shall prove to be a worthy comrade. Bastian, you have chosen intuitively. Your young inamorato shall serve us well as he works his hypnotic attraction on all within our great house and when in their weakened state of being...

...I shall rob them of their thoughts...

.....revealing the dark secrets that fill The Castle Nostromo.

Bastian has returned without the information I had requested of him. We still have time to find those who meet in secrecy, as the Eve of Coronation has not yet been planned.

Aislaria's foul scent clings to the walls that surround my chambers. She believes she has evidence that will secure her a seat near to mine on the throne. Her futile threats shall not sway my decision, the choice has been made.

The shadows whisper a name to me...Armand, one of my brother's closest allies. This could be damning for there are many in our clan who would stand with him...against me. He is of the original vampire clan...second to the beautifully sadistic, alpha male, who once lead a clan void of the female of our kind.

His raven hair and starless eyes held power over us all. When he spoke in a soft dark voice, his sweet breath perfumed with the blood of a young virgin would brush across my cheek, bringing me to my knees... I would have done anything for him...his eternal servant. We all would have.

Centuries have passed and nothing has been heard of him...I would be a poor leader should I choose to believe we are safe...that word does not exist amongst our kind. Perhaps I have seen our future...from the past.

The disloyal whispers of those who are not faithful to the Nostromo family echo throughout the castle. My brother Zacharias is no longer part of our home yet his spirit still lingers.

Bastian has informed me of the secret meetings held on the outskirts of the vampire domain. I asked him to find for me the name of the one who leads these hidden gatherings. There are many who would not have me as Emperor, however, I find comfort in knowing Bastian is most loyal to me along with many others. He shall be greatly rewarded.

I remain guarded and shall send Christos, another of my most devout companions, out into our family with heightened awareness. I know I have a strong alliance within our great vampire clan, still the opposition grows and this could be the downfall of the Nostromo ...but not under my reign.

Does time truly exist?

So precious the days, hours and seconds seemed...when I was human. Time had once etched itself across my face in the wrinkles of laughter and furrows filled with emotions, the proof of having experienced love, joy, and sadness of a life long gone.

Time no longer reflects upon this body. A black soul encased in a beautiful, cold, perfect corpse of the vampire...my timeless curse.

Winter is here and I find warmth in your memory. Kyrania, if only you were here with me, then time would no longer occupy my thoughts and my heart would beat once again in the love we shared.

We were the living confirmation of love between the Nostromo vampire clan and the Sairim, coven of witches. Within our relationship our families could have been one.

The war between our cultures rages and now it is I who must lead the Nostromo against the Sairim. When you left me, you not only sealed the fate of our people, you chose our future...separating us forever.

I must ascend to the throne of the Nostromo and I would have given it all up... for you...for us.

A timeless existence filled with darkness...behold, my future!

Still...I love you Kyrania, only you. Powerless against the gravity which pull my eyelids down...it is you in my thoughts...my eternal dream...your face...